Top Ten Presidential Debate Rules
10. Debate will be as bland and uninteresting as possible
9. Loud buzzer sounds every time Bush makes up a word
8. No bare midriffs
7. Candidates may give props and shout-outs to their peeps
6. Makeup artist will be on hand to touch up Senator Kerry's cosmetically enhanced, Day-Glo orange horse face
5. If the candidates wish to chew tobacco, they must provide their own spittoons
4. If Kerry gets too long and boring, he'll be shot with a taser
3. When tough questions are asked, candidates may phone a friend
2. First half of debate will focus on Kerry's flips, second half, flops
1. Bush must wait until closing arguments to wheel out caged Osama bin Laden
Posted by Clifton at October 8, 2004 03:51 PM | TrackBack