« I've Got Dysentery and One of My Oxen Just DiedMainPresident Bush Loves Him Some Porkers BBQ »

February 20, 2007

So It Turns Out I Have Salmonella Poisoning

My sister calls, the conversation goes like this:

Her: "So, you're sick. Is it your stomach?"
Me: "Yes"
Her: "Did you recently buy some groceries from Wal-mart?"
Me: "Yep"
Her: "Peanut Butter?"
Me: "Yes"
Her: "Peter Pan Peanut Butter?"
Me: "uhhh, yes"
Her: "Serial number starting with 2111?"
Me: "[expletives]"

More information can be found here.

  • del.icio.us
  • digg
  • Ma.gnolia
  • share on facebook

| By Josiah Roe | 6:05 PM

Comments

Yikes. That really sucks. I'm glad I'm a Jif man myself.

Posted by: garver at February 20, 2007 6:35 PM

Though that sucks, your recounting of the conversation is brilliant.

The great thing about salmonella is that it doesn't usually kill you. Apparently the bad thing is that you sometimes wish it might. Feel better, man.

Posted by: ryan at February 20, 2007 6:40 PM

that sucks big time. i got food poisoning last year from the taco bell on broad and it was horrible. i had to go to erlanger.

our peter pan pb was the same serial # too. we ate half the jar before this all came out. luckily, none of us got sick but we threw it out anyway.

peter pan's a bastard.

Posted by: davidm at February 20, 2007 6:43 PM

"Shoppers across the country were warned to throw out jars with a product code on the lid beginning with "2111," which denotes the plant where it was made."

"To get a refund, consumers should send lids and their names and addresses to ConAgra Foods, P.O. Box 57078, Irvine, CA 92619-7078. For more information, call (866) 344-6970."

Hmmmm. Throw it away... send it in... throw it away... send it in...throw it away... send it in...throw it away... send it in...

I say fill the jar up with your vomit and diarrea and mail that in.

Posted by: James at February 20, 2007 9:27 PM

Although I sympathize with Josiah (I have to, I married him), I must recount the funniest part of this sad story.

Josiah didn't have that conversation with his sister unti about 4 or 5 this evening. He had stayed home from work all day b/c we thought he had the flu. Being the man that he is, he really can't cook. So, what does he make himself for lunch? What else - a peanut butter sandwich!!!

He is gonna remember that sandwich for another couple days, I am afraid! LOL.

Posted by: april at February 20, 2007 10:52 PM

April, I'm gonna find that funny in 3-7 days!

Posted by: JosiahQ at February 20, 2007 11:10 PM

Suggestion: don't throw out the jar. It'll be a lot easier to get a piece of the class-action lawsuit that's bound to be pending.

Can't believe that actually occurred to me, but there you go.

Posted by: ryan at February 20, 2007 11:38 PM

That is nuts. No pun intended. What are the chances?

You know this reminds me that I have a friend whose wife has been sick all day. I better check to see if they recently bought any of the bad stuff.


Hope you start to feel better.

Posted by: gid at February 21, 2007 12:39 AM

josiah,

you're right. it'll be funny in 3-7 days.

until then, though...it's just runny.

sincerely,

daniel

Posted by: daniel at February 21, 2007 8:32 AM

From this week's issue:

The List
February 21, 2007

Other Recalled Peanut Butter Brands

Peter Pan and Great Value peanut butter were among ten brands of peanut butter recalled last week due to concerns that they might contain Salmonella. What other brands were recalled?

1. Jif Extra Moldy
2. Runny & Honey
3. Skippy Creamy & Crampy
4. Tainty’s Original
5. Newman’s Throne
6. Brown’s Extra Chunky & Sweaty
7. Skid’s Nutty Delight
8. Country Crock Raw Room Temperature Chicken Spread

The List is (usually) satire.
Especially this week.

Posted by: Bill at February 21, 2007 9:48 AM

that's what you get for shopping at Wal-Mart. Shame on you.

hope you feel better.

Posted by: anna at February 21, 2007 9:54 AM

Josiah - in situations like this, I know the desire to seek out the wrongdoer is strong. Someone somewhere let some bad peanuts get into jars of peanut butter. Trust has been broken, just like your bowels, and you want to make the guilty pay. Here's your man.

Posted by: Micah at February 21, 2007 11:59 AM

Post a Comment About "So It Turns Out I Have Salmonella Poisoning"










Remember personal info?






Email "So It Turns Out I Have Salmonella Poisoning" to a friend!

Email this entry to:


Your email address:


Message (optional):


MORE ENTRIES

Visit the Irresponsible Journalism Archives for further reading.

HS Designs in the News

My buddy Mat Sears, the finest woodworker in Chattanooga

Community Research Council Changing Its Name

to "The Ochs Center for Metropolitan Studies"

Fight the Smears

I've met people who believe these things

Baracky: the Movie

Yo Adrian!

Detroit City Council

probably the one and only time I'll be thankful for the Chattanooga City Council