A Jeep In Summer

I mailed a surprise package

today. I don't know whether the recipient is at the address I found or whether he's on the road, so I don't know when he'll get it.

It feels kind of weird. I don't really know him, and I guess sending him a small present could be construed as stalkerish behavior. But it ain't. I just hope that I've guessed right about a couple of things (size and color), I hope the USPS delivers the package to exactly the right place, I hope that getting a completely unexpected present makes his day.

I think part of why this feels weird is that I'm pretty much out of that (social) place where it's really easy to care for people in small ways--for example Lara can't see me across Shakespeare class and see that I'm having a rough day and send me Caramellos in my campus mail box. The guys I live with aren't gonna surprise me except by paying the rent and utilities on time! They will however, not begrudge me a beer when I need one.

Maybe I've moved on to a place where we need bigger things than a Caramello. I know that one of my housemates, the temporary one, doesn't need candy, he needs to know how to really really love his wife. I need more than someone to buy me breakfast--but I really like it when someone does. I don't want to need more than breakfast, and I want to be grateful for who and what shows up.