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October 20, 2004

Hobos, Part One: They Bother Me

Did you ever notice how hobos are always trying to share food with you?

I was recently in a boxcar with Ernie, a hobo, and he had a piece of corn bread which he'd found in a dumpster. He took a big bite with his almost toothless mouth and asked if I wanted any.

"Want some cornbread? It's still good..."

"No thanks," I said, barely masking my displeasure.

Then he started singing "The Wreck of the Old 97."

After a few seconds, he paused.

"Come on! Sing along!"

I declined.

That's the problem with hobos. They're always telling you what to do and trying to push food in your face. And if that isn't fascist, I don't know what is. Why do you think politicians always campaign on the back of trains?

Political Pronouncements | By colrus | 01:38 PM

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